Yes Man
What if you said yes to everything--to every question asked, every opportunity offered, every occurrence? What would that change in your life?
And then, being open to everything, saying yes to all, what if it meant that you lose what means the most?
We cannot see the future. We can only know our hearts and minds, and some of us do not seem to find even that ability for nearly a lifetime, if ever. How do I know that saying yes to this today won't mean losing something valuable and even more important to me tomorrow?
My daughter once told me that she woke up and asked herself what would she do if she could not fail? I found a card that said that and carried it around with me for a long time. I dismissed the philosophy--I couldn't risk failure, I had to succeed, I had to continue working, striving, earning money, certainly, but approval, love, affiliation. Had To. no option.
and one day it occurred to me that I didn't have much left to lose. Daughter and son grown. sufficient success in my field to let it go and start over if I wanted. too much debt still, but even that had a way out. So what would I do?
Despite all my misgivings, despite my daughter's concerns I leapt for the one thing that I most wanted to do, if I could not fail. I married for the fourth time.
Today, nearly two years later, I know that to leap is not to succeed. There's a lot of living between the leap and the not-failing. I have failed again at marriage. But, taking this risk one more time--deciding to marry when everything in my head said I was a fool and half my heart saying it, too--is my success.
Because I could do that, I could also leave my comfortable job and retire. Because I could do that, I could also take a bigger job that means more responsibility and daily, if not hourly risks because I am responsible for 2.5 million and 32 people and service to nearly 25,000. Is it neurosurgery? Do I hold lives in my hands? No.
But what I do matters and I have even greater ability to effect change.
I proved to myself that I was neither too old nor too staid to make a change for me.
I said yes and it did not all turn out well but I would not have chosen a different path, not really. I am growing and I am excited about the adventures I can have yet and the even greater, kinder, more healing changes I can make for me but also in this world so in need.
Say yes. It can make a world of difference for all of us.
And then, being open to everything, saying yes to all, what if it meant that you lose what means the most?
We cannot see the future. We can only know our hearts and minds, and some of us do not seem to find even that ability for nearly a lifetime, if ever. How do I know that saying yes to this today won't mean losing something valuable and even more important to me tomorrow?
My daughter once told me that she woke up and asked herself what would she do if she could not fail? I found a card that said that and carried it around with me for a long time. I dismissed the philosophy--I couldn't risk failure, I had to succeed, I had to continue working, striving, earning money, certainly, but approval, love, affiliation. Had To. no option.
and one day it occurred to me that I didn't have much left to lose. Daughter and son grown. sufficient success in my field to let it go and start over if I wanted. too much debt still, but even that had a way out. So what would I do?
Despite all my misgivings, despite my daughter's concerns I leapt for the one thing that I most wanted to do, if I could not fail. I married for the fourth time.
Today, nearly two years later, I know that to leap is not to succeed. There's a lot of living between the leap and the not-failing. I have failed again at marriage. But, taking this risk one more time--deciding to marry when everything in my head said I was a fool and half my heart saying it, too--is my success.
Because I could do that, I could also leave my comfortable job and retire. Because I could do that, I could also take a bigger job that means more responsibility and daily, if not hourly risks because I am responsible for 2.5 million and 32 people and service to nearly 25,000. Is it neurosurgery? Do I hold lives in my hands? No.
But what I do matters and I have even greater ability to effect change.
I proved to myself that I was neither too old nor too staid to make a change for me.
I said yes and it did not all turn out well but I would not have chosen a different path, not really. I am growing and I am excited about the adventures I can have yet and the even greater, kinder, more healing changes I can make for me but also in this world so in need.
Say yes. It can make a world of difference for all of us.
posted by Cecilia Ann | 12:26 PM
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